Onion Public Radio, Podcasts Rundown-Amusement-Park Owner Sleeps In Bumper Car Published: January 5, 2007 Print Is Back. Get The Paper. Become A Member. Advertising Laura Bush Crushes Life Out Of White House Intruder Continued on next page Explore Tags Vol 43: Issue 1 Related Coverage The Final Episode Of The Topical Papa John’s Comes Under Fire For Cruel Treatment Of The Bulbous, Deformed Creatures That Lactate Pizza Sauce Scientists Warn Americans To Stay Away From That Bird