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Reflecting Pool Drained After Duckling Deaths

Authorities announced plans to drain and decontaminate the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool after 80 ducklings died from snail-borne parasites. What do you think?

Sam Richie • Headphone Jacker

“I guess I’ll just have to stare pensively into the Dupont Circle Fountain in the meantime.”

Sam Richie • Headphone Jacker

Julianne Lendway • String Detangler

“I see the statement about the current political climate nature is going for here, but the metaphor honestly seems a little heavy-handed.”

Julianne Lendway • String Detangler

Andrew Morris • Yacht Scuttler

“This is a black mark on Lincoln’s legacy.”

Andrew Morris • Yacht Scuttler




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper