Our Annual Year: Best Of July

Published:

August 1, 2019

Woman Spirals Into Vortex Of Self-Doubt After Trader Joe’s Cashier Does Not Compliment Any Of Her Selected Items

Pizza Crust Saved To Make Pizza Stock

Gynecologist Inserting IUD Promises Woman It Will Be Just A Quick Pinch And Then She’ll Be On The Floor Unconscious

4-Year-Old Convinced Father A Moron After 45th Consecutive Hide-And-Seek Victory

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Suspended For Next 10 Rulings Following Supreme Court Bench-Clearing Brawl

Pelosi Concerned Outspoken Progressive Flank Of Party Could Harm Democrats’ Reputation As Ineffectual Cowards

Trump Honors Brave Heroes Who Slept With Wives Of Deployed Soldiers

82-Year-Old New Jersey Congressman Bill Pascrell Quietly Asks Ilhan Omar If He Can Be Part Of The Squad

Trump Escalates Baltimore Attacks With Rambling, 3-Hour Press Conference Tearing Into Edgar Allan Poe

Paul Ryan Lauded For Inspiring Millions Of Young Gutless Fucking Cowards To Take On Leadership Roles

Real Buzz Aldrin Spends 50th Straight Year On Moon Trying To Signal Earth To Warn Of Imposter

God Orders All Followers To Swallow Cyanide Capsules In Preparation For Voyage To Alpha Centauri

Frustrated Subway Marketers Scrap $150 Million Jeffrey Epstein Ad Campaign

ICE Sends Agents Home With Sacks Of Flour To Practice What It Like Detaining Real Baby

Small Town Ravished By Alejandro

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