MLB Opening Day Marred By Strikeouts

NEW YORK—Players, coaches, fans, and Commissioner Bud Selig expressed concern for the state of professional baseball Monday after MLB’s highly anticipated Opening Day was “completely ruined” by a rash of strikeouts that began during the afternoon games and didn’t end until the day was over. “I know players can be a little rusty, but there were strikeouts in literally every single game,” said Selig, adding that in some cases there had been more than one strikeout per inning. “I want to assure the fans that things will improve. If these batters put in a little more effort and try to focus, we don’t have to have another strikeout this season.” Selig, who also condemned MLB hitters for an unreasonable number of fly-outs, pop-ups, and groundouts, threatened to cancel the 2010 season after learning the league’s pitchers gave up 96 walks.