Microsoft released its new operating system, Vista, on Jan. 30. Here are some of its features:
Microsoft Word’s helpful paper-clip icon now blinks at rate of normal humans
Enhanced graphics on “System Is Not Responding” pop-up window
Five new card-back designs for Solitaire
Something that Apple would never, ever dream up in a billion years
4,391 security flaws to be patched over next 15 years
Promise of broad, open-minded future or some bullshit
Lists blocked wireless connections with greater speed and accuracy
New operating system, same old Microsoft Paint
