WISCONSIN:
Russ Feingold (D) vs. Ron Johnson (R)
Barber:
Feingold: Tony’s on Jefferson Avenue
Johnson: Wife cuts his hair
Position on taxes:
Feingold: Extend tax cuts for only bottom 90% of earners
Johnson: Extend tax cuts for 110% of earners
Position on Iraq:
Feingold: Insufferably verbose
Johnson: Eerily silent
Folksy Hook:
Feingold: Knows a lot about sports
Johnson: Built his business from the ground up
Stance on Abortion:
Feingold: Like all Democrats, believes that women should visit their abortionist for regular checkups twice a year
Johnson: Opposed, but believes you have every right to gun down a fetus that willfully trespasses onto your private property
Position on Gun Rights:
Feingold: Too scared to voice true opinion on Second Amendment while standing next to Ron Johnson at debate lectern
Johnson: Answers all questions by firing his rifle once for “yes” and twice for “no”
