ICUs Reach Breaking Point As Nation Hits 4 Million Coronavirus Hoaxes

WASHINGTON—With medical workers overwhelmed and hospitals short on supplies, intensive care units across the nation reportedly reached a breaking point Thursday as the United States surpassed 4 million coronavirus hoaxes. “We are continuing to see an exponential surge in patients who arrive in our ER and fake life-threatening symptoms of a virus we all know doesn’t really exist—or, if it does, is no worse than the flu,” said Dr. Melinda Rowenta, a critical care physician in Miami, explaining that the popular trend of pretending to be dying from Covid-19 had put an incredible strain on the Level 1 trauma center where she works. “All the coughing and wheezing and gasping for air—just cut the theatrics, seriously. Every day, valuable hospital beds are being taken up by these hired actors who feign extreme agony as part of a secret conspiracy to keep our economy from recovering. It’s making it so that people with actual deadly illnesses are now afraid of going to the hospital because the media has them terrified they might catch this fictional respiratory illness.” Officials in Florida and other states have also criticized the hoax’s participants for the breaking point recently reached by overburdened county morgues.