The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.
1966
The Super Bowl scraps its four post-quarter shows in favor of one big halftime spectacular
1968
The Grambling State University marching band puts on “A Tribute To Civil Unrest”
1976
Commissioner Pete Rozelle forced to nervously entertain crowd with anecdotes for 35 minutes after marching band’s instruments stolen
1989
NFL adds Diet Coke as show sponsor after realizing it could be making money off this shit
1993
New Kids On The Block member Jordan Knight’s career comes to an abrupt end after a vicious hit from Lawrence Taylor breaks both of the singer’s legs
1998
NFL house band The First Downs treats the crowd to a set of arena jam standards, including “We Will Rock You,” “YMCA,” and “Welcome To The Jungle”
2002
U2 commemorates the victims of 9/11, leaving the country to wonder what Bruce Springsteen was up to that he couldn’t do this instead
2004
Janet Jackson exposes her bare breast as a metaphor for how the paparazzi had laid bare the dignity of her family, her flesh and blood
2008
The halftime show is televised for the first time
2013
This performance by Beyoncé shattered all Super Bowl halftime norms by being enjoyable
