Grandma Coughing Better These Days

LOUISVILLE, KY—Confirming that the woman finally turned a corner after symptoms first developed more than 20 years ago, sources confirmed Thursday that local grandmother Patricia Riner was coughing better these days. “She seems to be turning less purple during it, which is good,” said daughter Lori Billig, Riner’s oldest child, who noted that along with her improved color, the grandmother had made remarkable progress in her ability to breathe between coughs. “It’s a little looser. I guess I would say it’s less ‘crackly,’ so that’s nice. She’s finally back to her relatively less-sick self. Who knows how long these better coughs will last though, so we’ll try to enjoy them while we can.” At press time, sources reported Riner had coughed up blood.