Ford Introduces New Environmentally Friendly Brown Paper Airbags

DEARBORN, MI—In what the auto manufacturer described as its boldest step yet in an ongoing effort to “be kinder to the planet,” Ford announced Thursday that its entire 2022 line of vehicles would come equipped with environmentally friendly brown paper airbags. “To help conserve natural resources, the bags in our occupant-restraint systems will now be sourced from 100% post-consumer materials and will be completely biodegradable after impact,” said Ford spokesperson Manny Gutiérrez, who added that sustainability was the foremost concern in the development of the airbags, taking precedence over factors such as cushioning, tensile strength, and ability to a halt speeding projectile. “While the brown paper airbags will be offered as a standard feature on all Ford cars and trucks, we’re asking that our customers do their part, too. After deployment, please remove any stray bits of bone, brain, or viscera from the airbag, stumble to the nearest recycling bin, and place the bag in a properly marked receptacle to ensure it doesn’t wind up in a landfill.” Though he stressed that it was ideal to reduce consumption of airbags by avoiding collisions in the first place, Gutiérrez noted that the brown paper could also be reused as gift wrap, packaging material, or a spooky, blood-soaked Halloween decoration.