With Nike set to release its new LeBron X sneaker this fall, the alleged $315 retail price of the shoe’s premium version has caused quite a stir. Onion Sports examines some of the basketball shoe’s innovative features.
Logo features a foot, symbolizing the nature of the product
Design comes from mockup LeBron personally pointed to on piece of paper
20 percent more squeak on all surfaces
Special sensor blasts air horn anytime someone says the word “basketball”
Nothing that hasn’t been run past Dwyane Wade first
Only the strongest, most experienced child laborers used to ensure quality
Like Air Jordans, only bigger and more annoying
LeBron James’ signature printed across each shoe 78 times
Each pair comes with super uncomfortable and ugly Chris Bosh shoe for free
Comes with built-in lesson to never spend $300 on a fucking pair of shoes again
