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Facebook Switchboard Operators Overwhelmed During High-Traffic Afternoon

MENLO PARK, CA—Straining to keep up with the frantic buzz of incoming calls, Facebook’s 25-person switchboard room was reportedly in a state of controlled chaos Friday afternoon in an attempt to handle the site’s overwhelming traffic. “Okay, I’ll connect you to her page. Yes sir, patching you into that album now. Sure, hun, here’s your Daily Mail post,” switchboard operator Gladys Palmer said into her bulky stereo headset, chain-smoking Virginia Slims as she reached through a tangle of cables, unplugged several nodes, and re-inserted them elsewhere to route the flurry of friend requests and status updates through the 2.45 billion-user social network. “Manager! We have another like coming through! Hang on—okay ma’am, yes, would you like to block a cousin? Of course, right away, right away.” At press time, the entire switchboard had ground to a halt after a video of a joyful dog with no front legs crashed the system.