,

Everyone Forgets To Bring Swimsuits To Coworker’s Party

’What Are The Odds?’ Pasty, Flabby Colleagues Say

ARLINGTON, TX—While gathered for a party at a coworker’s backyard pool Saturday, out-of-shape colleagues at Shuster, Layne & Associates were struck by the coincidence that they had somehow each forgotten to bring bathing apparel to the festivities. “Huh, that’s funny. Guess we can’t swim,” said Barbara Fortner, 44, one of the many pale, somewhat overweight employees who remembered to bring alcohol and food to the poolside festivities but, curiously, forgot body-baring swimwear of any kind. “It’s a shame we can’t take a dip. Ah, well.” At press time, the employees were reportedly hovering around a table laden with a variety of dips, barbequed pork, and sheet cake.