Despite portraying himself as a paragon of free speech, Twitter owner Elon Musk has repeatedly given into the requests of powerful autocratic regimes to silence their citizens. The Onion asked Twitter users how they felt about Musk’s censorship, and this is what they said.
Lyle Clinton, Dog Walker
“It’s not censorship if someone obnoxiously insists it isn’t.”
Phil Nassim, Construction Worker
“Musk is protecting the true spirit of Twitter, which, of course, is talking a ton of shit online and immediately backing down when faced with real world consequences.
Leo O’Hara, Sports Blogger
“I respect that Elon Musk is standing up for American values by saying one thing and then doing the opposite.”
Josh Bennigan, Plumber
“I applaud his commitment to absolute free speech, which is one of the three phrases you are currently allowed to post on Twitter.”
Kris Merillo, Graphic Designer
“I’m glad someone around here has the balls to cozy up to authoritarian regimes for millions of dollars.”
George Furber, Lawyer
“I don’t mind him obeying foreign governments as long as he fights back against the true global puppet masters—college kids who won’t agree with me.”
Nicole Phillips, Paralegal
“I guess the world just isn’t ready to hear the truth about Aerosmith.”
Allan Hale, Mechanic
“I’m dismayed by how quickly he sold out, but that’s what I get for trusting a filthy, conniving immigrant.”
Persephone Camara, Nurse
“I just assume he’s trying to be the only active user left.”
Katrina Sanchez, Optometrist
“Censorship is a small price to pay to become a crumbling platform with record-low engagement.”
Hank Packard, Longshoreman
“Censorship isn’t about what you can’t say in India or Turkey, it’s about what my kids tell me I can’t say at my own Thanksgiving table.”
Joann Wilhelmi, Customs Inspector
“It’s frankly outrageous that he would accommodate such demands when he still does nothing about all the Succession spoilers I see on my feed.”
Sandra Carpenter, Receptionist
“Is he taking requests on whom to censor? I have enemies.”
Marnie Russert, Café Owner
“It’s not censorship. It’s the government wanting you to do something and you complying.”
Xavier Wilson, Paramedic
“What you call censorship I just call filtering free speech through an autocratic regime.”
Trent Oliver, Yoga Instructor
“I am confident the world’s richest man is doing everything possible to maintain Twitter as the last bastion of speaking truth to power.”
Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, President of Turkey
“Good boy.”
