Creepy Old Man Has Book Filled With The Home Phone Numbers Of Everyone In Town

BOTHELL, WA—Apparently obsessed with keeping tabs on the personal contact details of his fellow residents, David Landry, a creepy old man, was in possession of a book filled with the home phone numbers of everyone in his town, local sources confirmed Thursday. “Oh God, I don’t even want to think about what he’s doing with that kind of information,” said Ruth Mendelsohn, a neighbor of Landry’s, adding that she shuddered every time she imagined the deranged 78-year-old flipping through his perverse registry, which is believed to be an attempt to catalog every person living in greater Snohomish County and reportedly contains a separate section that tracks area businesses. “It’s so upsetting. He has our first and last names, our addresses, our phone numbers. I’ve heard he even has us all alphabetized in there! Ugh, what a freak.” At press time, Mendelsohn became even more creeped out after she learned Landry has been in possession of a new, updated version of the book every year he’s lived in the town.