Concussed Sidney Crosby Makes Rambling Appeal To End NHL Labor Dispute

NEW YORK—As labor negotiations continue between the league and players’ union, a severely concussed Sidney Crosby reportedly made a rambling, largely incoherent appeal to team owners Thursday to end the NHL lockout. “We have to get back out there by September for all the fans in Pittsbell [sic] and before Stanley,” said the Pittsburgh Penguins star, who reportedly trailed off in the middle of several sentences and at one point began bleeding from his left ear. “I want to score the cup, and why can’t we that? Not without the airplane on the bus. We need to get the pucks, because of ketchup in—after the movie.” Sources confirmed that Crosby then stared silently at the floor for several minutes before suddenly looking up and asking who he was.