,

Brangelina Expecting

Angelina Jolie is pregnant with Brad Pitt’s baby. What do you think?

Albert Wesker • Supervisor

“Apparently, the weak dollar has made it more cost-effective to produce certain things here than import them.”

Albert Wesker • Supervisor

Claire Redfield • Assisted Living Professional

“I believe that this miracle child will die for our sins, most likely during a taping of

Claire Redfield • Assisted Living Professional

Leon Kennedy • Engineer

“Looks like Chris in accounting is 10 bucks poorer today. Pay up, sucker!”

Leon Kennedy • Engineer




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper