Birds Demand Natural History Museum Return Dinosaur Skeletons Plundered From Ancestral Resting Place

NEW YORK—In an effort to protect their cultural heritage, a group of activist birds held a press conference Wednesday demanding that the American Museum Of Natural History return the dinosaur skeletons that had been plundered from ancestral resting places. “It’s a disgrace that our forebears were dug up from their burial sites only to be put on display and gawked at by tourists,” said Bebe, a white-bellied caique who was reportedly able to trace her lineage back to the Cretaceous, confirming that the only way for the museum to rectify the wrong was by returning the fossilized remains of the Stegosaurus, Tyrannosaurus, and Triceratops to their rightful descendants. “Instead of serving as a means of profit for the very people who stole them, these relics should be given to the bird community to do with as it sees fit.” Bebe added that in addition to their deceased ancestors, the museum should immediately return thousands of avian treasures such as leaves, twigs, and berries currently lining their exhibits.